Please hold my digital hand as I envision your futures through the all-seeing-and-ever-watchful integrated laptop webcam. But please, use the nearest hand sanitizer before you do. Y’freaks.
I see a world obsessed– obsessed in a game of battle royale. It’s been so long no one remembers the origins of the virus. Some might say it was the Satanist terrorist group known as Fortnite players. Some scholars might even reference the strain PUBG (Player Unknown Battle Grounds).
You were wise to have come to me. Alas I have the vaccine to your uncultured swine flu.
It did not originate from the gaming community.
Like you abominations of nature, it too had innocent beginnings.
It was known as Battle Royale, a book by Koushun Takami written in 1996 and published in 1999 in Japan.
A book about junior high school students who are taken to a deserted island and forced to kill each other as part of an authoritarian government program. Battle Royale became a contemporary Japanese pulp classic who was adapted to big screens in eastern cinema in 2001, where it got instantly shunned for its violent content.
Frightened students. Close friends turning on each other. Unspoken love. Streams of mini Uzi bullets. Government revolt. Blood.
The 2001 movie does an excellent job at capturing the original emotions and grit behind the themes of the now turned pop culture genre. And I highly recommend the book for any literature snobs who are not yet acquainted with it. Koushun Takami’s satirical prose is perfect for the sick game the government makes the students play.
NOW IF THE PLOT OF BATTLE ROYALE SOUNDS FAMILIAR TO YOU HUNGER GAME FANS. It’s because it’s the same thing. The Hunger Games is a shameless rip-off of the Battle Royale book and movie. DON’T BELIEVE ME? WATCH IT, YOU AVOCADO MILKTOAST. Why are the other Hunger Game movies not as good as the first? BECAUSE THEY ONLY MADE ONE BATTLE ROYALE BOOK.
And if you loved The Hunger Games and don’t like Battle Royale. You’re racist. Not a joke. The only reasonable criticism you, as a hunger games’ fan can make, is that it’s hard to remember the Japanese names.
“Yah well… There is no originality in art in our current, modern day society”- Fuck off.
“Why can’t I just enjoy the Hunger Games movies? Peeta ❤ Katniss”
Sure- I may be coming off as a huge hipster right now, but guess what. I don’t care. Its not my fault. Don’t talk to me about that Twilight bullshit. I don’t wanna hear it.
You know whose fault it is?
J.K Rowling.
She’s the reason for e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g.
Why are all these cinematic classics being turned into shitty teen dramas?
Why is the last movie of the Hunger Games divided into two parts?
Harry Potter Deathly Hollows Part 2 (2011).
The Hunger Games (2012).
WAKE UP PEOPLE. THE INDUSTRY IS USING YOU AND YOUR SHITTY TASTES TO MILK MONEY OUT OF YOU BRAINLESS COWS.
The J.K-pocalypse is nigh.
Schooling/On/Shootings 
